Empty Tomb

After a night of babysitting my nephew so that my sister and brother in law could have a much needed date night, I decided to stop by St. Matthew's perpetual adoration chapel for some prayer before the Blessed Sacrament. The chapel is on the way home and, I tell you, there isn't a time that I pass it that I don't hear God's still, small voice saying, visit me.

As I drove up to the chapel, the first thing I noticed was that there were no cars parked outside. Not a one! This was strange as Jesus is never left alone, not even for a minute. But I proceeded to enter the chapel in hopeful expectation that my Jesus would be there and that the hourly adorer must have simply walked there that night. Much to my dismay when I entered the chapel, Jesus was missing! I quickly began to turn away as if the adoration chapel were a store who's closed sign was lit. But as I walked away, something took me back there.

So I sat there in the chapel doing what I had gone there to do, pray for people. You see, we sent out our support letters earlier this week. Financing this adoption is a huge leap of faith...a leap we had put off for a long, long time. And as we have sent out our letters for support and have received a few responses back, our lives have begun to change drastically. I am beginning to think that the spiritual effects of this adoption are not only going to affect our future child but also us...in a big, big way. The very first donation that we received literally brought me to tears. And with the couple more that we received this week, more tears flowed. Matt and I are eternally grateful and forever touched by the mere fact that God is providing and people are hearing the call of the Lord to support us. So I went to the chapel tonight to pray for those people that generously gave towards our adoption this week, so that a child will have the opportunity to have parents and Matt and I would be able to have the blessing of children in our lives.

As I sat in the chapel with Jesus in Blessed Sacrament not there, I began to think of Mary Magdalene visiting the tomb of Jesus and realizing that He was not there.


"Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance.  So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved, and said, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don’t know where they have put him!”
"... Mary stood outside the tomb crying. As she wept, she bent over to look into the tomb ."- John 20

As I reflected on that scene in silence, asking the Lord to speak to me, I connected with Mary. I came to  see Jesus where I knew He would be. But He wasn't there. My initial reaction was much like Mary's, sadness, disappointment, confusion. But then God reminded me of the hope of the resurrection! He reminded me once again that Jesus is not only present in the most Blessed Sacrament but truly and totally present in the people in our lives. Earlier this week, I fell to my knees when we received our very first donations towards our adoption. I literally felt like the funds towards our adoption were not only coming from the people that sent them but truly from God Himself. And with each donation, I feel in a deeper way, Christ's love for me. I know that this all sounds like a christianese thing that people nonchalantly say, "the Lord provides blah blah blah"...But until you've stepped out in a way of faith that scares the mess out of you and you actually see God working and providing immediately, those words no longer seem so cliche. He so provides.

It's early in the process of fundraising and we have a ways to go but with each day that passes, our faith is altered in ways that we could have never imagined without first hearing the call of the Lord to adopt and taking the jump.

Thank you to those that have donated to us already this week. You have no idea how you have been Christ to Matt, myself and our future child. Your notes of love bring endless tears of joy. We're keeping those little love notes as proof of God's amazing power ...when people simply answer His call.

Just as a note, the Blessed Sacrament and the monstrance were in fact not present in the chapel that night due to the fact that St. Matt's was celebrating First Friday Mass. I must have gotten there as it was ending. There were cars leaving the parking lot to the church. Jesus had been distributed in the flesh to those who attended the First Friday Mass just minutes before I came...another reminder that Jesus in the flesh is truly alive in His people. God is so, so good.